A forest fire in a desiccated landscape ravages everything in its path and has no compassion or consideration for collateral damage. The trees, having spent centuries taking root and competing with the foliage around them in a race to the sun, are turned to ash in what seems like a matter of hours. The ash itself then falls, suffocating the wildlife already battling the fire for precious oxygen. Nearby springs and brooks are sullied and made undrinkable. Everything is decimated. Ecosystems are destroyed or relocated. Where once there was a vibrant, teeming culture there is only desolation and charred soil.
But then over time a funny thing happens.
From that devastation, slowly, new life begins to grow. Lifeforms that would have been starved out or preyed upon by stronger species grasp the opportunity left by the vacuum and bloom, taking up the space cleared by the destruction. The wind and rains come and wash away the detritus of the fire, replenishing the soil. The sun comes out once again and shines on new life. You would be amazed at what grows here.
This can be the same with your divorce if you do it correctly. You have been caught in the midst of this fire and with the correct perspective (and some very understanding friends) you can let it clear a path for you. My advice to you? Blame the fire. Use the fire as an excuse to leave the stalest parts of yourself behind. Cancel plans. Resign from a group or club that no longer inspires you. Leave work earlier (or stay later) without feeling guilty. Find the quiet moments in a life that was too loud. You are not who you once were, and that can be beautiful. Reallocate time and energy that had been dedicated to your spouse or to your children to yourself.
See what grows.